Tag Archives for " list building "

Question: How many facepalm moments did I have in the following conversation? First, let me give you some context: Last week, I switched internet service providers. I asked H, who works for me, to return the modems and cancel the old subscription. H: Unfortunately, we can’t cancel over the phone.  A: Who told you this? H: The postman. A: … H says, […]

One of my subscribers beat me at my own game… So I’m currently licking my wounds and plotting my comeback. In the meantime, I shall uphold my promise as a Supervillain must, above all else, be a man of his word. (It’s hard to retain your minions if they don’t believe you’ll honour your end of the bargain.) Anymoo, I […]

If you can top this story, I’m going to feature you to my email list. You think weird stuff happens in your country? I bet it won’t hold a candle to what I saw in a local newspaper: Apparently, one of Turkey’s largest lakes, Lake Burdur, went… missing. Well, kinda. It has lost one third of its water in […]

Someone please explain this female mystery to me: Why does the fairer gender keep sixteen pairs of shoes under their desk? Back when I was a lawyer, I observed this strange phenomenon every time I walked into a female colleague’s office – without fail, across three jurisdictions, in 11 different countries. It boggles the (male) mind. So I experienced […]

I wish I could be more passive-aggressive. Secretly, I yearn to develop an acidic wit to melt away stupidity and scour it off the face of the earth. Until that day, I suppose I’ll have to content myself with reading other people’s fits of enraged brilliance. Such as this note taped to a vending machine at a Fortune […]

Do you have any pet peeves? Of course you do. I should have asked, “Will you run out of fingers before you can count them all?” Well, I’ll raise you one. I’m with Whoopi Goldberg on this: I don’t have pet peeves like some people. I have whole kennels of irritation. And my biggest, scariest, most menacing, snarling dog of […]

​Saw this on a site called notalwaysright today: === (At the self checkout, a customer is waving a lime over the scanner.) Customer: “Why isn’t my lime scanning?” Employee: “Produce items don’t have barcodes on them, ma’am.” Customer: “So?” Employee: *facepalm* === Ha! But I can do one better. This actually happened last month. It was one of those instances where you go, “The universe does have a sense […]

You’ve finally nailed a business idea. Check.You’ve put together a website. Check.Next up, is building an email list of potential customers. You barely have traffic, and yet you need to attract them onto your list and attract a lot of them quickly. Hmm…*some head-scratching and staring blankly into space occurs*Does this sound familiar to you?You’re […]

​I love children. Maybe not enough to make one of my own. But I definitely like being the “fun uncle.” On Friday, my best friend’s three year old daughter wanted to play “Hide and Seek”. Except, I don’t think she quite gets the concept. Every time I went to go look for her and took too long, she would […]

Let’s wake you up this gray Monday morning with a bit of controversy. As obsessive as I am at testing, no I don’t actually A/B test my ads rigorously. Why? I’ll tell you in a bit. But first, something amusing I saw on a forum: “Today, I woke up to 7 texts about the data overage charges that were accrued […]